Earlier my father made me a steak sandwich for breakfast and asked me how it was, so I knocked it on the floor and asked him if that answered his question. A few minutes later, I thought to myself "you know what? That wasn't very rational, I think something may be wrong with me". Thankfully, I then found Stephon Marbury's video...blog...pod...cast.... live internet show thing. By comparison, I am one bland, normal sumbitch.

Basically, Stephon is mentally unstable, and thinks sitting in front of a webcam shirtless and screaming at the internet will make things better. I've had his channel open for about twenty minutes now, after hearing the radio and other sources tell me a crazy black man was self destructing on a live stream. So far, he's threatened one person in the chat room, yelled "I'm doing me, I mean me, I'm doing me, I mean me, I'm doing me, I mean me" multiple times, and at one point ate a big glob of Vaseline for no apparent reason.

Occaionally, Starbury gets up and starts dancing around to terrible music, or sits like a poor knockoff of The Thinker with his finger jammed into his skull near one of his tattoos. The fact that I can cite his finger being on his head and near a tattoo at the same time does a pretty good job of establishing what kind of person we're looking at here.

He talks about how people in his life have died. For a couple minutes, he held a phone to his ear and had a conversation. I'm quite confident there was nobody on the phone. I've been repeatedly spamming in the chat "PUT SHOE ON HEAD". He hasn't done it yet, but he will. Motherfucker ate Vaseline.

There are two groups of people in this world. People who admit they like seeing other people have meltdowns, and people who lie. Go check it out, it appears he has the camera on 24/7, so odds are he'll be there. He promised me that it was early and we have a long day ahead.